And this was one of his tireless sleepless nights. Changing sides restlessly as he lied on the bed. Tiny drops of sweat dripping down from the top of his head towards the pillow. Eyes wide open. His eye-balls moved in the spontaneous motion as he concentrated towards the ticking sound of the clock. Something deep was going on in his head. His thoughts flashed in front of his eyes at the speed of light.
And soon, the stillness gained entropy. The silence turned into anger. He got up. Frustrated. Clawed and threw back the blanket he had himself covered with and sighed. Three long sighs. Expecting them to de-pressurize his brain struggling with the enormous pressure of competition. He remembered how he saw everyone around himself getting settled down and move ahead in life but himself. He felt that pressure and tension. As he still had a long way to cover. He remembered how his parents compared him to their neighbor’s son who was earning far better than anyone else. He hated him anyway.
He swallowed the gulp of water down his throat and lied down again. This time to forget everything and actually try to get to sleep. Forcefully closing down his eyes and trying hard not to think about all those things again. How could he explain to everyone how hard he was trying to get back on his own feet. How much struggle he was doing to prove his worth. But continuous failures not only had him sunken of his confidence but his interest to actually take part in something productive.
How energetic and proactive he was. Always took the responsibility to do the best. His work had the skill. And the expertise. He couldn’t sleep without finishing off the work he had to finish. And now, his sleep was gone because of an entirely different reason.
It felt like all of him had hibernated deep in the freeze. Like he was all in his subconscious. And there he lied, trying hard to get an ounce of sleep.
And his compulsion finally worked.
Flowing down beneath in his oblivious thoughts, he finds himself in a different world. Standing opposite a mirror.
He slowly approaches the mirror to touch it. Only to find himself getting absorbed within.
As he got absorbed in, the thoughts he had earlier engrossed the mirror. The utter failures he experienced, the rejections, all of them snapped in front of him. He could see all those things again happening right in front of him in the mirror. It was like his brain was morphed into that mirror which showed the bitter truth. He had a reality check deep in his mind.
That was it for him. He couldn’t take it anymore. He started running away from it. Far far away. Leaving the mirror behind.
He ran and ran and ran.
The surroundings changed. Afraid. He still kept running, from his own thoughts. And the transition happened. He found himself running on a race track.
“The Race of Life…”, the banner read.
He was stumped amaze. He looked behind. And there he saw, people running towards him. The competitors. As they drew closer, what did he notice! The competitors were nothing but his own failures and fears. Personified. And he realized he was the part of the race indeed. He still kept running. And saw those terrible fears leaving him behind.
Tired of running now, he murmured, “I cannot let them win. All this time I’ve let my failures and my fears get onto me and push me behind. But this is it. I won’t let them win. I will win.”
And he summoned all his strength to his best and ran. Ran not just to finish the race, but to win. And to his amazement, he left all those terrible competitors of his failures and fears behind. And he finished the race. He won. He won from his own fears. He won from his own failures. He passed them away and found his way to success. He found the real worth of working hard. And he stood there proudly. With new hope, enthusiasm and confidence.
That night, he slept peacefully with a smile on his face. The sleep, the peace he wanted so badly. He found it.
He woke up the next morning. The sun was shining brightly. But what was different?
This morning, he knew what he had to do…